This is an excerpt from Chapter 1 of my book.
This "parent's guide" has a three fold intention. I hope that the knowledge and understanding derived from this parent's experience can help other parents to realize that lots of us have been there, done that and survived. I hope you can learn from my mistakes.
I have also tried to write "a guide to parents" for professionals so that an understanding of us and our problems can be added to the growing body of knowledge about autism that informs the choices made for our children's welfare and education. We are often made to feel as if we are either part of the problem or else not part of the solution. We ought to be recognized as the most important resource that our children have.
I also like to think that I am learning to view the world through the "Asperger Lens" (Cumine, Leach and Stevenson 1998). One of the most disabling aspects of autism is the impairment of social cognition. In any encounter most of us are aware of at least three viewpoints; our own, that of the person with whom we are socially engaged and that of the wider audience. This is sometimes referred to as the Theory of Mind. We are aware that other people can have their own point of view, different to our own and can make a leap of imagination to share in that viewpoint. For the person with autism it is an achievement sometimes to learn that people do have alternative viewpoints and it is an immense achievement to accept that another person's viewpoint can have equal validity with their own.
All too often we neglect to reciprocate. It is so easy to fall into the trap which says that, because the person with autism has a partial grasp of social reality, their view is therefore invalid. For everyone of us our grasp of social reality is flawed. But it remains our reality. So it is for the person with autism.
This is my book in Spanish 
My problem, like that of many parents and autistic people is that we have first hand knowledge of autism and a fair degree of expertise in applying that knowledge. But we have no way of validating our knowledge, skills and understanding other than by going on courses where lecturers tell us things we already know and do not want to hear from us the things that they do not know.
Well, not all the time. I went on a very basic course. It did not teach me much, but it reminded me of much more. And it was rewarding to find my book on the recommended reading list! Thanks Sue :-) It was even more rewarding to get my brain working and write again. Here are the essays I wrote along with my other writings on autism.
It is not easy being autistic in a neurotypical world. Maybe the most difficult time is adolescence. Your teenage peers are changing in ways you do not understand. Social demands are more complex. And you have to cope with all the changes going on within yourself; physical, mental and emotional.
For many autistic teenagers mainstream schooling becomes a nightmare. But there is nowhere else for them to go. I would like to establish some alternative provision, a centre where autistic teenagers could go before they reach breaking point.
I want to help them to be positive about themselves, to accept and understand their autism. I want to teach them how to cope with some of the things that bother them in the neurotypical world and develop strategies to recognize and modify some of the traits within themselves that add to the bother. I want to help them complete their education by exploring methods that play to their strengths rather than constantly exposing their weaknesses.
So I was delighted when Liane Holliday Willey invited me to contribute a chapter to her recent book Asperger Syndrome in Adolescence But writing is not enough. I want ACTION I am trying to persuade my LEA to back some of my proposals and give me a chance to demonstrate what can be done inpractical terms to help autistic people.